It’s been a while, since you left this earth. It was on a Tuesday and I remember that the sun was shining.
When I saw you laying there in your bed, I was rather filled with peace. You had a smile on your face and it seemed like you where still breathing.
Also I knew, that you now would be with your heavenly Father, who you told me so much about.
When I remember you, it is your smile that fills me with warmth. Funny, I never heard you laugh out loud. Somehow, it wouldn’t have fit to you.
When I remember you, then I think of all the stories you told. The experiences you collected over the years. Adventures you had with your children.
When I remember you, I think about the discussions we’ve had. Why blimps fly so slow and why pistachios are salted. It was the first time I had them in your little room.
When I remember you, I go up the stairs in my memories in the hope to find some candy in your cupboard. And you always had something.
When I remember you, it is your photo album. I was looking at it over and over again. You had to tell me all the stories. Sometimes, I told with you, or filled the parts you left out. I knew them all. Sometimes, we just sat and listened to the rain drumming on your window.
When I remember you, I think about the days you’ve gotten tired and I just read to you. You loved the psalms and mostly psalm 23. “The Lord is my Shepherd”. Back then I didn’t understand, today it’s a big relief.
When I remember you, I think about our talks we had about God. You told me a lot about him and for that I am really thankful. I always admired you for being so consistent in your prayers.
When I remember you, I think about the songs we sang together. Sometimes I just sang for you, when you where to tired, sometimes, we just listened to the radio and let them sing for us.
When I remember you- how often did we talk about how it will be in heaven. I worried, that I wouldn’t have enough time to get all my things together, and if I would recognize you. And I was hoping Jesus would come back before I died, because I thought I would be startled if he had to wake me up out of my grave with a loud bang. Now you are there and get all the answers. You where looking forward to this for so long. We where wondering if you would look down with God and watch out for me. Do you remember?
When I remember you, I see a joyful, blessed, peaceful grandma, who despite the war and pain had everything in life that she desired. Even when things weren’t easy. Someone who knew, that she had a friend in Jesus. Someone, who was excited about the littlest things and happy about her life.
When I remember you, I think about our last serious conversation we had. You told me, that you would just be around for one or two more weeks. That was the first time I doubted your words, but even then you where right.
It doesn’t make me sad anymore. I gained so much. I didn’t miss out on anything. We spent so much time together, and so I was part of a most wonderful life. Thank you, for leaving so many lovely memories behind.